Our date of death is not the date etched on our tombstone. The day we stop dreaming is the day we start dying. When imagination is sacrificed on the alter of logic, God is robbed of the glory that rightfully belongs to Him. In fact, the death of a dream is also a subtle form of idolatry. We lose faith in the God who gave us the big dream, and settle for a small dream that we can accomplish without His help. We go after dreams that don't require Divine Intervention. We go after dreams that don't require prayer. And the God who is able to do immeasurably more than all our right brain (creative/imagination side) can imagine, is supplanted by a god who fits within the logical restraints of our left brain.
Nothing honors God more than a big dream that is way beyond our ability to accomplish. Why? Because there is no way we can take credit for it. And nothing is better for our spiritual development than a big dream because it keeps us on our knees in raw dependence on God.
If you've read The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson, you'll probably recognize that except. (I didn't put it in quotes because I know, for whatever reason, when I'm reading a blog, I skip through quotes to get to the content original to the blogger instead of someone else...so, here I am giving credit, and hoping that you read every word of the first two paragraphs and that they spoke to you as much as they spoke to me.)
I also know that I don't like reading super long blog posts, so I'll try to keep this short, but no promises. There are a lot of emotions, thoughts, tears, and desires of my heart that are wrapped up in that excerpt.
Let me start by just saying hi. I know it's been a while since I've blogged, and honestly it's been a while since I've felt like me, which is most of the reason why it's been so long since I've blogged. Much of the "not feeling like me" stemmed from fear that I can't make one of my biggest wildest dreams come true. But that leads me to how I want to sort of resurrect my blog...and my business...and my life.
I can't do it. That's a fact. I can work and work and work and try and try but unless I let God be the painter, and me be the brush, my God-sized dreams can never come true.
In reading (actually listening to) this book, it has become clear that I've been letting my fear be bigger than my faith. All of the fears about my abilities, my future, my path in life have been overshadowing my faith in God. When your faith is greater, fears disappear. When your faith is greater, there is no reason to worry because the definition of faith is complete trust in someone or something. Complete trust. The only time crazy, seemingly impossible goals and dreams can come true are when you allow God to take control. The only way I can live the life I dream of is to live in raw dependence on Him.
Let me give you an example.
Part of my job is building relationships with people. I have always been insecure about my ability to make friends. (Going into that is a whole other post we'll tackle later.) But if I let that fear of connecting with other people, one of the vital functions of life, run my world, I would get nowhere. My business wouldn't grow, I wouldn't grow, I would eventually be utterly miserable. But when I realize that God is holding my hand through this dream of mine, and let Him lead the way, knowing He will allow me to cross paths with the right people, that He is using me to paint his masterpiece, the fears go away. The second I start thinking about the fears, I hesitate again. But keeping God's great love and power in mind, I am able to do things I could never do on my own.
And that's how I've met so many of the people who have decided to change their lives for the better. That's how I've inspired you guys...it wasn't me. It was God. I was just the paintbrush.
I know I've shared bits a pieces of of my spirituality with you on social media, but that's just the thing. I was only allowing Him into bits and pieces of my life...then I'd stray off for a while and do my own thing then come back, refocus, feel better, then lose focus and stray off again. Well, as I've spun myself in circles over this past year or so, (again, an upcoming blog post) I realize that this is not the way. HE is the way. He will lead and light my path. I will go where He takes me. I will no longer settle for small dreams that don't require raw dependence on Him, and I promise to keep dreaming in ways that show Him that my faith is bigger than my fears.
So many people tell me I inspire them to live healthier or to get in shape, and I am truly honored and humbled to hear you say that. But on the list of God-sized dreams that I have is to inspire you to start a relationship with Jesus. Not to go to a certain church or start following a certain religion, but to really get to know Jesus and what God's love and grace truly mean. I realize that some of you don't believe, and that you may be turned off by this post or stop following me altogether...but I pray that maybe something will speak to you. Maybe one day you'll realize that HE is the way to achieve crazy, seemingly impossible dreams. HE is happiness. HE is love, a love that never ends, no matter what we do. A love so deep we could never even fathom. HE is one heck of a reason to give your dreams a chance.
No comments:
Post a Comment